Something happens somewhere for some of us, through the years. Our voice is quietened. Maybe it is when we are small and we speak up and someone laughs or yells at us to be quiet. Or maybe actually we do not know why or how or when.
So we have things inside of us that are just never said. It’s not like those words sit inside us like jumping beans either, it’s like once the opportunity to speak our truth, or opinion or idea has passed then they just settle quietly in a big pile inside us…quiet. And yet if we pay attention we will notice that we can feel this inside us. A kind of a pile of autumn leaves. Raked up ready to be gone and yet not tended to so still there.
It can happen at any time in a woman’s life. I have experienced and have heard others say that it becomes more of a quietened time being at home with our children as we raise them, or during the mothering years when our mind, body and soul are given to the process of growing little important, treasured, human beings.
See a lot of people; particularly lots of males make their mark on the world by speaking up. They turn up in our newsfeed as business experts, holy men or inspirational speakers. For example Tony Robbins or Russell Brand. There are women to and more and more are coming forward which is wonderful.
We mothers though, we change the world one by one… as we get up in the middle of the night exhausted to once again change the sheets of the child who was sick in the night. We change the world as we listen intently to our teens problems with teachers and peers at school and do our VERY best to guide them to their own solution. Even though our heart BLEEDS when they hurt, we do our VERY best to empower them by loving them above what we need as mothers and loving them in a way the enriches their future exchanges with people as well as fills their hearts with love to fuel their way through this challenge.
So our voice changes in motherhood. It might get quiet for a time as we whisper words to our children. We sing lullabies to our children as we soothe them to sleep. We are tender, loving. And sometimes to our absolute horror those grumbling piles of unsaid words sometimes explode too. We find ourselves watching ourselves as an observer might, as we say things we will later regret. Like our children, our inner voice when ignored, eventually gets a little pissed off, angry and annoyed.
So how do we nurture ourselves so that our voice is expressed, gently, firmly, eloquently, wildly or however it needs to be expressed? How do we bring ourselves back into a world of ours that enables us to do this?
Firstly bring awareness to the words unsaid. As we would lovingly guide our beloved child we now guide ourselves.
Secondly, trust. Allow ourselves to trust our SELF. The very one we are. The true and pure self that is completely present and authentic. Trust what we have to say. Trust that we can say it.
Thirdly, be prepared that what we speak could actually turn out differently than we imagined. A suggestion may not be received well, a solution may not work as first thought. It is OKAY. Someone somewhere acts or does not act on what we say. However to speak is to release what is waiting inside us. We get to express who we ARE in the world.
Finally, love ourselves through the whole process. Love and accept. Love and allow. Breathe in worthiness. Breath in I am ENOUGH. I am OKAY.
When we remove judgement of ourselves and allow things to just be. The sheer FREEDOM can be …. Well… no words. It just is. Standing in presence is an experience never forgotten and the more we experience it, magically the more of these experiences of presence appear.
Once our voice is rebirthed we can dance again with life. We can gently take tiny risks and tiny risks can lead to huge leaps of faith that take us further into who we really are. Living life and loving life. Expressed, stretched and fulfilled!
As we experience this, the muddle of unsaid words in our heads and the crazy thoughts that wake us at 3 am are a little smaller, a little less crazy. Peace comes because speaking our truth weeds out the other judgmental, critical, angry words that congregate and crowd out our head. Space is created and new sprouts of love seem to fill those spaces.
We live with more joy. More realness and connect with more like-minded souls. Begin slowly, like waking in the morning and stretching tall… take it at your own pace and remember that it is okay, totally okay to be truly, really, totally YOU.